Essentials, Necessary and Nice to Do

As is apparent, I haven't posted very much at all on the blog this year. Much to some of my friends' chagrin as they want to see recent pictures of our little Mason. As this blog also was intended to serve as a place of my 'musings' I thought I would explain my lack of posting this last year.

For those readers who really know me they know I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (in other words, I'm a Mormon). In December of 2009, I was asked by my bishop (the ecclesiastical leader of our congregation or ward) to serve as the 2nd counselor in the Relief Society Presidency. The Relief Society (RS) is the oldest and largest all women organization in the world and functions under the direction of the priesthood within the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

The motto of the Relief Society is “Charity Never Faileth” which stems from the first Relief Society meeting. The sisters were asked by the Prophet Joseph Smith to assist the brethren “in looking to the wants of the poor—searching after objects of charity, and in administering to their wants.” The sisters took this call to heart and became a society devoted to seeking out the poor and needy.

That was the first reason I started posting even less this last year. Then I became pregnant with our 2nd child and as was the case with my first child, I had really bad morning sickness/nausea. I felt my energy was better spent tending to my own needs and that of Mason.

Then in April, I attended a training meeting that is held every April/March the week before General Conference at the Tabernacle with the RS president I am serving with. At that meeting, the General Relief Society President, Julie B. Beck talked about how we as the sisters of the Relief Society need to prioritize our time so that we can be more effective in our various roles we each have in life.

She said that there are ESSENTIALS that should be done every day/week/month as appropriate. Things such as daily scripture study, daily prayer morning and night to our Heavenly Father, weekly Church attendance, and regular temple attendance as our situation permits (some people can go everyday, some attend every week, others attend every other week or once a month and others attend as often as they are able to travel to the temple if they live far away from a temple).

After we have done the daily ESSENTIALS, then we are to look after the NECESSARY things in our life, such as preparing meals & eating, housework, personal hygiene, budgeting, school, work, etc.

Then, after the ESSENTIALS and the NECESSARY are done, then we should allow ourselves time to do things on our "Nice to Do" list, which for me includes internet time (e-mail, facebook, blogs), sewing, family history, watching TV and movies, reading, scrapbooking, etc.

Sister Beck said that as we prioritized our time and made sure we did the ESSENTIALS and NECESSARY items first, we would be surprised at how many of the "Nice to Do" things we got to do.

It is true - when I have followed this prioritization I am amazed at how much I actually get done in a day and how much of the "Nice to Do" things I get to do - as opposed to when I do "Nice to Do" things first and then feel like I am a failure of a stay-at-home mother/wife for not having very much done in the house while Marc was at work. Or the fact that too many times I have gotten ready for bed and ready to crawl into bed at 1am and realized that I hadn't prayed that morning or studied in the Scriptures at all. And the Spirit says to me, "You had HOURS to spend on the internet and you couldn't make any time for your Heavenly Father today?"

The following week at General Conference Sister Beck gave this talk and again talked about prioritizing. "And upon the Handmaids in Those Days Will I Pour Out My Spirit"

A week ago Sunday we had a regional conference for Utah County where Elder Steven R. Snow, President Boyd K. Packer, Elder Jeffrey R. Holland and Sister Julie B. Beck spoke to us from the Marriott Center at BYU (it was broadcast to all the stake centers in the area and the 1/2 million members who live in this 'region'). Sister Beck again talked about prioritizing. The comment that was most biting to me (as something I felt the Lord was specifically telling me I needed to change about myself) was, "I am concerned about the young mothers. The time spent on the computer is time that could be spent nurturing your children." (that's paraphrasing it, but it was something to that effect).

I realized that I truly did need to make a change in my priorities so that I don't neglect nurturing my children - for that is why I chose to stay at home: to raise my children and teach them many of their life skills myself.

So.... if I don't even get on here once a month to update the blog, know that it's because I am trying to do what is most important and I'll try to update as often as I feel I am able to without sacrificing valuable time with my God and my family.